An Open Letter of Apology

Dear human being,

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for walking past you, absorbed in my own cares, while you sat shivering on the street
      sorry for not even giving a smile.

I'm sorry for not making eye contact with you when you handed me my receipt
      sorry for only noticing you insofar as you are useful to me.

I'm sorry for hurrying through my time in your presence, rushing to a person or place that seemed more important
      sorry for making you my last priority.

I'm sorry for treating you like another box to check off my to-do list
       sorry for making our relationship another project to perfect

I'm sorry for letting my words and actions make you feel judged or condemned
      sorry for adding to the hurt and confusion I never cared to consider you were feeling

I'm sorry for trying to give advice when all you needed was someone to listen
      sorry for making it all about me.

I'm sorry for snapping at you and speaking harshly
      sorry for unleashing words that wound instead of words that heal

I'm sorry for refusing to rejoice in your victories and successes
      sorry for making it a competition

I'm sorry for giving you less than my all because I was grumpy or tired or hungry or restless
      sorry for choosing my feelings over you

I'm sorry for allowing my hurts and frustrations to keep me from delighting in your unique goodness
      sorry for making you the sum of your weaknesses and failures

I'm sorry for forgetting to treat you as the magnificent, precious, unrepeatable child of God you are
      sorry that Love tried to get through to you, and I got in the way.



And so goes on the litany of apologies I should have made long ago
                         the litany of little moments where I didn't let Love guide

The truth is, dear human being, I've made a lot of mistakes. I make a lot of mistakes

I am not patient. I am not kind. I'm jealous and boastful, and arrogant and rude. I insist on my own way. I'm irritable and resentful.... 

The truth is, dear human being, I don't know how to love. I'm learning to - from Love Himself! - but I'm a hopelessly slow student.

I can't defend myself for the times I've willingly chosen to meet you and treat you without Love.
  can't defend my impatience and unkindness and jealousy and resentment.

I know I'm in the wrong. I put up no defense.

I simply come to ask for your forgiveness.

Because truly, dear human being, I am sorry.